Guest Post - 5 Things I miss about my life before children

The other day I asked my wife Kerry to write me a post on the 5 things she misses about her life before children. If you want to check out her blog click here. You can also follow her on Twitter by searching for @burnettkerry



Below is my wife's post. Enjoy.

5 things I miss about my life before children.

Our children are 5 and 1 and we wouldn't change them for the world.....well maybe just a little, if the tantrums and biting can stop thank you, that would be lovely! I love my life the way it is but sometimes when I'm knee deep in spew, and having to face a nappy that's exploded out of the sides and is seeping down Alice's legs, or when my oldest is crying that he doesn't like me because I have given him 50/50 bread instead of fucking white!! I cry a little for my old life...just for a few moments.

Does this make me a bad mum? Hell no I'm sure it makes me normal!!

The other day my husband asked me to write a post for his blog "5 things I miss about life before children". So, here goes.

- I miss "us" - This sounds a little crazy as I write it, but once you have children it seems the couple you used to be, disappears a little, Now we have an amazing family but we don't have the "sleep at the grandparents" escape that a lot of parents have so we have never spent any time alone away from our children, and this doesn't bother me, of course, we have children, they are our life now and I love to have quality family time all together, but when we hear our friends talk about "their" time together on certain weekends because their children have been at "grandparents" I do get a little jealous. The sleep-ins together, waking up at 8.30am and just laying together till one of us rolled out of the pit to pop the kettle on, chilling out and stuffing our faces whilst we watch a DVD or visit the cinema and not having to worry about how the children are acting with Nanna. Have we been too long? Will they be behaving? Having to nip to the toilets half way through to make a cheeky call just to check up!

Our days now consist of him going to work at 6.30am then gym on the way home until 5.45pm, his tea at 6 whilst I bathe the children then put them to bed 6.30. My bath 7-8 then his bath 8-9 and a cheeky catch up on whatever series are watching 9-10 Usually at that point I can't keep my eyes open so I'm off to bed! Same tomorrow!!

2- Spending time alone - This covers a lot of things really, just in general I miss time on my own, like going to the gym, maybe a little swim or doing a bit of clothes shopping.....if you are a mum "what's that" I hear you say? well, do you remember before children you would go out and buy clothes to make yourself feel and look nice?? You would actually be able to wander around a shop and look at items that were hung from the stands without a bored child in the pram screaming because she's playing the "throwing the dummy out of the pram" game and your not! and now she knows she is in a shop she wants to get out and walk!!

3 - Relaxing holidays - We all know as parents that once the children come along there is no such thing as a relaxing holiday! I bloody love a good little holiday whether it's in a caravan or sunning it up in Disney world... but it is crazy hectic! The things you have to take for just a weekend away is crazy, once the pram, steriliser, and the travel cot are in the boot there's no room for anything or anyone else!!  Then once we get there and unpack its time to repack and come home again! Although spending a weekend with children eating an endless amount of sweets, ice-cream and drinking pop mixed with long nights dancing (or should I saw running around in circles on the dancefloor) can feel like a month!

So yes, sometimes I miss the holidays with just the hubby when all we would need is a little suitcase, our passports and then we could just forget about our day to day life and relax on the beach, reading books with the odd break to stuff our faces and swim for two weeks!

- Working- Now there is something I never thought I would miss!! work!! When we decided to take the step of becoming parents we said I would give up work and stay at home with them myself, I loved the idea of this. So, six years ago when I was 7 months pregnant I left work to have my bubba and never returned! I miss the whole thing about work really. I miss been sociable, having conversations with adults, I miss my own wage, We share everything but I do miss having my own money and not having to think about how he would feel if I went and spent £70 on a haircut! but most of all I miss feeling accomplished.....Now I know when we work, whatever our job is we are just a number but there's that feeling inside that you get when you've worked your ass off and the area manager has been and says how well you have done, all that hard work pays off. My work at home feels expected. Because I don't work I feel it's expected that I do all the ironing, cooking, cleaning, washing, drying, as well as look after two children, it's an exhausting job and there's no cash bonus at the end for working extra hard at it.

- Friends - Once I became a mum I saw less and less of my friends, The nights out obviously became few and far between and going for coffees etc didn't seem that rosy to them when you have a screaming little gremlin attached to you. Sometimes when you make plans children have a habit of becoming ill and you have to cancel making you feel guilty! The texts became few and far between, before children I used to have conversations every other day if not every day, now because I've taken forever to reply back there usually occasion texts. Been a stay at home mum is great and I know I'm very lucky to be in this situation but it also can get very lonely.

So there are my top 5 things I miss about my life before children, I would say it was pretty much impossible for our lives not to change once children come along it's a little like a tornado making its way through your life and for the first few months, life is bat shit crazy on the new parent train but it starts to settle, you get into a routine and then the calmness comes and before you know it everything around you changes and you have a new life. As a family.


Thanks for reading.

K xx

A big thanks to the Mrs for writing this post for me. What are the five things you miss about your life before your children came along? If you want to write a post for me on this then get in touch via richiesayers86@gmail.com

Rich

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Comments

  1. Yup, I agree. Having kids sure changes your life a lot, but I wouldn't change for the world! I do miss my lazy Sundays spent on the sofa in front of the TV though! #wineandboobs

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    1. Thanks for reading and commenting. Lazy sundays are the best days. Bring on the teenage years where thats what they'll want to do

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  2. yep I agree with you on the Working thing and time alone.

    It seems that every where I go now there is a tiny little shadow following alomng behind me. The odd time I sneak off for a bit of peace and quiet and to gather my thoughts (tweet in private) it's not long till my absence is noticed!!

    Thanks for linking up to #wineandboobs will we see you next week with your own list?

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    1. Thanks for commenting, i appreciate it. I am thinking of doing the post ablut myself yes, just dont want it to sound exactly the same. I will definitely be linking up with wineandboobs again as its great. It was my first linky and was very straightforward

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